Film: A Complete Unknown
Screenwriters: A couple of guys who know people and yadda yadda
Directed by: Some guy called “Man-gold.”
Starring: Elle Fanning (Sylvie), Monica Barbaro (Joan) (These women are gorgeous!)
Dear Timothee Chalamet,
I know nothing about you, so that probably makes me the perfect person to send you a message about your movie out called A Complete Unknown, where you play Bob Dylan.
People are raving about this movie, and so excited for you and your accomplishment. I am not a Bob Dylan fan, myself. I think he just looks like another miserable poet, and I am not pulled in by a clever turn of phrase or a little riff, but rather someone’s heart, and I don’t feel much of one in that guy, so I don’t care how much fame or money he has. I hadn’t planned on seeing, writing about, or making any sort of “thing” about a movie where he is the subject, but my friend wanted me to see it with her, so I did. I really liked some music biopics like Respect about Aretha Franklin. (Marlon Wayans was f-ing awesome in that! Can I say f-ing?) And then there was the very impressive performance of Chadwick Boseman in Get on Up, about James Brown. And of course, Jamie Foxx in Ray. I wasn’t super impressed with the Whitney Houston movie a couple of years ago, because I wanted to feel closer to her rather than so distant, though that flick taught me some things I didn’t know about Whitney.
I did really like Inside Llewyn Davis, by the Coen Brothers. I felt that Inside Llewyn Davis said more about Bob Dylan than this new hit you’re in, which features Bobby (or you, rather) for the whole two hours.
I loved Inside Llewyn Davis. In fact, I have to watch that again as soon as I have a free two hours. Maybe my whole 2025 is going to be an homage to Inside Llewyn Davis. That film was good, and it’s a film, you know? What I mean by a film, is that this was a work of art about an artist (in this case, Llewyn Davis) who is finding his way, and not just a spectacle on a screen. Some things we see on screens are just spectacles that are written according to formulas, and they get some well-known people to jump in and play the parts and make a holiday hit. But then there is art, like Inside Llewyn Davis.
Could Oscar Isaac, who plays Llewyn Davis, be any more beautiful and brooding? Probably not in any way that’s well-done, and since this movie is so good, he plays the role perfectly—just enough beauty and brood. Oh my goodness, I have seen so many films—and I’m sure, so have you—but how many films have scenes that stand out to you forever after you see them? So I want to tell you about this scene in Inside Llewyn Davis that just lasts and lasts in my mind, and lasts and lasts again and again. I suspect it will last in your mind, too, now, forever, if you ever read this little blog of mine about watching movies with a feminine gaze. (Let me add, I watch with a healthy feminine gaze. By feminine, I mean receptive and partial to the sacred rather than materialistic consumption and satisfaction.)
So in this one scene in Inside Llewyn Davis, Llewyn Davis gets in front of a record executive, and he sings this song that is like, the most beautiful f-ing song you ever f-ing heard! (Can I keep saying f-ing?) And then after he finishes the song, well…. Let me just see if I can show you in video what happens instead of explaining it to you….
Oh damn, I can’t show that clip to you. It’s not available on YouTube. You’re going to have to watch the movie to see it. It looks like it’s free on Pluto.
The point that this scene in the movie Inside Llewyn Davis makes, is that there is art, and there is money-making. Some people are good at money-making, and they call it art, and they run stuff in the big “money-making places.” You know, it’s like art-ish. And then there is real, true art, which actually stems from some divine source, and pushes our boundaries, and sees into the future, and comes from a place so deep and pure and wild that we may stop breathing for a moment, or feel like we just saw a spark go off in front of us when we witness it, and we need to gather our bearings and think about it, and cry, and stuff like that. You know, art.
So I think you should see that movie, Inside Llewyn Davis, and I am sure you will collect a lot of money for this A Complete Unknown jawn, and I hope you will put that money into helping people who are disadvantaged make some good art, because there are a lot of really really good artists out there who don’t have the good luck to be in the right place at the right time, with that whole broken-asshole-vibe that the American public seems to love.
By the way, you are so cute, Timothee. Do people ever call you Thee? Like, the way the French say, Salon de the…? It would be so fun to call you French the (tay) and tell you about the screenplay idea I have for you, where you just play a cute 29-year-old guy with all this privilege and prestige, who is still totally confused about how to make women…um…have a good time. I have it all in my head and it features that song by Joy Division, “Love Will Tear Us Apart.” It is a damn depressing song but it’s so damn good.
Hugs and love and happy new year, you guy!
Ms. Wonderful
P.S. If anyone wants to know how it feels to be a complete unknown, I will tell you it is pretty cool to walk into a restaurant and just order soup and warm bread and eat it and enjoy your meal without worrying that anyone is going to freak out with excitement and think you’re a god or something.